On Being a Super-Mom...or Not.

Being a mom to 2 boys under 2 has been interesting to say the least. It's a crash-course in multi-tasking. If I wasn't a good multi-tasker before, then I have to be one now as my sanity relies on it. But I think I have developed a pretty successful strategy. 
Let's work through an example.   Situation: Toddler is crying because he is hungry. Baby is crying because he is hungry. House is a mess. Dinner needs to be made because adults will be hungry. Kitty is running around like a maniac. Mom is losing her sanity. 
Step One: Assess the situation You need to prioritize which screaming/crying/tantrum is most urgent, and then attend to that kiddo first.  In this situation, I can hope that Toddler is probably open to some sort of reason. I first try and appease him by giving him the apple he is asking for. If I am lucky, that is the end. I'm never lucky. 
Step Two: Damage Control Most of the time the simple solution of giving my toddler what he wants just results in me not actually grasping what he really wants. For example, he asks for an apple. I assume this means he would like an apple. I am a fool. What he really wants is an apple, but only after being offered 3 other things, and then he wants it cut in a certain way, in his blue bowl and sitting in a certain section of the kitchen. While I try and discover what the magic routine is this time, I let him have his little meltdown and attend to screaming Baby. 
Step 3: Neutralize one of the threats to sanity I feed Baby. This is an easy fix, and I am pretty much guaranteed he will be super happy afterwards for at least 10 whole minutes. 
Step 4: Return to the original problem and re-attempt damage control By this time I can usually hug the toddler and help him calm down. We can then reattempt the apple-giving and he will usually concede at least 1 of the requests (perhaps this time I can use the plate instead of the blue bowl) and be content.
Step 5: Accept the things you cannot change I know I cannot make Kitty sane. I also know I cannot keep my house clean. It's best to just abandon all hope that these things will ever be accomplished. 
Step 6: Attempt the task you need to get done Yesterday I actually was bouncing a bouncy-chair with my foot while baking muffins and keeping an eye on my toddler. This actually happened. For a second I felt like a pro. I mean, look how amazingly I am multitasking! 3 things at once! And muffins to boot...that's like Martha Stewart stuff right there. Then I remembered I hadn't showered in 2 days and my house looked like a bomb containing toys, food crumbs and random kitchen utensils had exploded. See step 5, and then make dinner.
Step 7: Once the kids are in bed, attend to your sanity Pour yourself a huge glass of wine, or cup of coffee or hot chocolate. Pat yourself on the back and say "Congratulations Mommy. You made it through another day."

Oh man, are they worth it! xo

Kitty and Peanut: An Analysis

We have discovered that Peanut and Kitty are at about the same mental development level at the moment. This means that Kitty has the approximate mental ability of a 10 month old infant. We have always suspected it was low, we just were never able to quantify it until now. 
Evidence: 
Peanut is obsessed with paper in general, but he has a special place in his heart for toilet paper. Especially if he can get his hands on the roll, and then pull it all off and rip it into tiny shreds. This is also one of Kitty's favourite pass-times. 
Kitty has long been obsessed with boxes. Mostly sitting in them and purring. But also scratching at them and tipping them over. Peanut also is loving to tip over boxes, and loves to bang on them to make noise. 

Can you find Kitty? (Surely she is plotting his demise...)

Both of them get the general mechanics of how a door works, but are unable to get past the obstacle if it is closed fully. 
Both are currently obsessed with yogurt. 
Peanut has also recently become fascinated with Kitty's god of idolatry: the bath faucet. While he is not as enamoured with it as Kitty is, it is still rather interesting. 
They both enjoy racing around and attempting to destroy anything that we own of value. Kitty is working on the furniture. Peanut is working on electronics and glassware. 
They both (for some unknown and disturbing reason) love to try and eat the tufts of cat hair that get missed by the vacuum. Blech. 
They have both figured out that the phantom screen we have over our front door can be used for escape if you push it at the bottom. And for now, the baby gate in front of the screen foils both of their escape plans. 

Yes, that is Kitty in a Bumbo...sigh

Kitty still has Peanut beat on the agility scale though. She can leap over baby gates like they aren't even there, and is much quicker at escape than Peanut is. She also beats him on the annoyingness scale as well; yowling when the baby is sleeping, crawling under the covers to cuddle in the middle of the night, racing around like a herd of elephants the second the clock strikes midnight. 
In some ways I feel sorry for her, being so dumb. But in others, I know she gets by on her looks, and she knows how to work it. Lets be honest, we only put up with her antics because she is so darn cute.
 And I suppose we could say the same about Peanut as well... 

Makeover Alert!

So, you may have noticed that things look a little different around here. I mentioned a couple weeks ago that I wanted to attempt to makeover the ol' blog. For the record: I did not, in fact, make it over. I found someone to do it for me. Someone who is much more talented than I. Someone who (most likely) did not have to spend 3 hours trying to get some page element to move over 1/3 of an inch to the right. Who is this genius, you may ask?! Why, it's Kim at 733 Blog Design! (insert applause here) 
What do you think of the new digs?
I did, however, do the photos in the banner. Well, and by "do the photos" I mean I arranged them and Hubby actually took them. So pretty much, I "did" them. Anyway, that was a fiasco in itself. To be honest, it is so incredibly difficult to take decent photos with crap lighting, but we tried to make it work. The fiasco part was the addition of Kitty. Why would I think that anything involving Kitty would go smoothly? We had a sheet hung so you couldn't see our insanely blinding orange wall (see photo in the sidebar for photographic evidence...the other walls opposite of these lovely orange beauties are red...I still can't believe we never painted when we moved in. Sigh.). Well, Kitty refused to stand on the sheet. She really wanted to be BEHIND the sheet though. And she also wanted to attack it, and "surprise" us by jumping out and attacking us. Except we weren't surprised at all, because she is a cat behind a white sheet. And she didn't jump out at all, because the sheet was too long. So basically, she just moved the sheet forward, and then got her claw caught in it and couldn't move. So she sat there with her paw stuck in the sheet and purred for like 7 minutes. 
Please excuse the quality of the photos...we didn't have time for things like "focusing". We were too busy being baffled.

Everything is A.O.K.

Things take a turn...

Surprise!!

She sat here for 7 mins. Purring. 

End result. 

Did I mention she is really pretty? 

New Baby + Kitty =

It's been a while since I've had a Kitty story. Truth be told, she's sort of gotten the raw end of the deal since Peanut arrived. Hubby's parents came for a visit and his mom said that Kitty was looking "a little ragged". Truer words could not have been spoken. 


I was wondering how Kitty would adjust to having a baby in the house. She has always been an interesting sort of cat. She loves attention, but only on her own terms. If you ignore her, she finds a way to get your attention. Usually by being incredibly annoying: boxing a gift bag, attacking a small plastic item and batting it across the wood floor, trying to crawl into a super loud plastic bag, jumping on your lap while you are trying to do something, or scratching at our nice leather kitchen chairs. Since my labour was so unexpectedly long, poor Kitty was home alone for 3 days. When Hubby finally came home the night Peanut was born, I am sure she thought she had been abandoned and was angry at the intrusion into her new kingdom. 


The first time we brought Peanut home, she ran to the door all happy to see us, until we put down the car seat. She freaked out. But being curious to a fault, she slowly crept up to check him out. The second she got close he let out a little squeak and she tore off down the stairs. Since then, she has made a sort of peace with the little man. She is super protective over him, however she refuses to get too close. She will get as close as possible to him without actually being near him. She goes to the edge of our bed and peaks over the edge of the basinette to check on him, and if he is crying she gets upset and looks at us like we are the worst parents EVER. 

Baby gift bags? Hardly. More like super-awesome Kitty forts!

However, she is suffering from a severe lack of being the centre of attention. The laser pointer hardly ever comes out anymore, and her annoying list of attention-getters has been getting more and more elaborate. Specifically, she has taken to NEEDING cuddles in the middle of the night. And only from me. She jumps on my stomach and then crawls all over me trying to find a spot to get comfy. She crawls up by my head, then down on my chest, then usually perches herself on the most awkward place possible, balancing precariously on my shoulder or hip or some other ridiculous place and begins to purr her little Kitty face off. Needless to say, this didn't go over well when I was getting up every hour and a half to nurse and was severely sleep deprived. However, it became very clear that any attempt to thwart her plan would be met with renewed determination to get what she wanted at all costs. Her tiny Kitty brain becomes so focused on something that she will stop at nothing to get it. So now, I give in and just let her pretend to sleep for those 20 minutes on my bent knee, even though I know she is just trying with all her might not to fall off. 


So basically, I have now become the most wanted person in the household. Peanut cries in the middle of the night, so I get up and nurse him and cuddle him back to sleep. Just as I'm about to fall back into the blissful abyss, Kitty leaps up and starts her balancing act. Once she finally has enough, Hubby rolls over and throws his arm over me for a cuddle. 


It's hard not to feel loved in a house where cuddles with me are so in demand. 

How to Get a Good Night’s Sleep While Pregnant

I have been thinking about this post for a while, but after getting only 5 hours of restless sleep and being up since 4 this morning, I thought perhaps it was time to give it a go. It has become increasingly difficult for me to get a good night’s sleep as my pregnancy progresses. I always thought I was pretty lucky, as I never really had any sleeping issues for the first and most of the second trimester, aside from constantly falling asleep in the middle of TV shows, or at 7pm. Sure, it was tough to deal with being sleepy all the time, and I’m glad I have more energy now, but it was NEVER difficult for me to fall asleep. In fact, it was too easy. However, everything has changed in the last few weeks. As my belly gets bigger, things are getting more difficult, and it’s becoming a huge challenge to get a decent amount of sleep.

I am sure this is due to many factors. The first is that I have restless legs every evening. It drives Hubby crazy while we are sitting on the couch watching TV, but it drives me crazy when I am lying in bed trying to sleep. The second is that I have to get up to pee at least once every night, no matter how well I think I’ve planned it. So this usually means I get up about 3 or 4am, and then I have to try and get back to sleep after, which is difficult. Also, lying in bed is incredibly uncomfortable, no matter how I try and do it. My hips hurt as if I’ve been lying on the hard floor rather than a soft mattress, my arm falls asleep from lying on my side, and it’s just plain uncomfortable to suddenly have an extra 20 lbs added to your frame, most of it sticking out of your middle. This extra middle-ness also tends to have a very acrobatic baby in it, practicing at un-Godly hours of the night. Also, I have some situation specific factors which include a mentally-challenged cat, and a snoring husband. So all in all, I’m fighting an uphill battle here.

So, there is a long and a short answer to this sleep conundrum.

The short answer is this: You can’t. It’s impossible. So don’t bother trying.

The long answer is more complicated. Let me begin by addressing how I’ve attempted to rectify the aforementioned issues.

Restless legs: I have yet to find a solution for this one, although I’ve recently received some suggestions (thank you, dear readers!) which I’ve yet to try. So far I have been trying to eat bananas, as potassium is rumoured to help. I really dislike bananas, so I’ve been incorporating them into smoothies and muffins where they are masked with other tastes, and their mushy texture is eradicated. I suppose I have seen a marginal improvement, if I am being honest, but it still is an issue. I do find it really helps to take a hot bath, but usually this is only a temporary fix. So I try and have a bath before bed, and then I usually have a break long enough to fall asleep.

Middle of the night pee breaks: There is really nothing that can be done here. I try and refrain from drinking too much before bedtime, and of course to drain my bladder before bed multiple times, but this is just something that us preggos have to deal with. Short of getting a catheter, I think we are hooped here.

Uncomfortableness: This one is where you can get the most creative. I thought I had it pretty easy since I sleep on my side anyway, so I didn’t have to break any habits of sleeping on my tummy. However, I find that even my old standby fetal position does not work anymore. First I tried propping up a bunch of pillows behind me (also helps with the heartburn) like a throne, and then sleeping with a pillow under my knees. This is a back-laying position, but alleviates the issue of putting pressure on the artery and restricting blood flow (which is apparently why you “shouldn’t” sleep on your back). However, I soon found that sleeping in a semi-sitting position was too difficult, as I always want to lay on my side eventually, and then it’s just really bad for my back, as the mid back is twisted in this position. So I scrapped that. Then I started getting some hip pain in my ligaments, so I needed to start sleeping with a pillow between my knees for support, and made a nest of pillows around my head and shoulders to be more comfy. This worked for a bit, but eventually the pillow between my knees (an L-shaped nursing pillow) would end up at the bottom by my feet and I would need to wake up to rearrange everything when I needed to roll over. Finally, I caved in and obtained a Snoogle pillow, which is a pregnancy specific body pillow which is supposed to cure everything. In Canada, it is very expensive (at least I think $70 for a pillow is expensive), and so I was very reluctant to spend money on something I didn’t think would work. I found a slightly used one for much much cheaper, and so have been using that one. I have to say, it solves the problem of having to rearrange every time I turn over, since it’s just one piece, so I just flip over and the part between my knees can go either way. I use it with my L-shaped nursing pillow by my head so that it basically works no matter which way I turn. By no means am I comfy, but it is an improvement there.

This is a Snoogle. I use the smaller end between my knees. It is a very odd looking thing...can nothing be cute in pregnancy?!?

Then there are the factors beyond my control. I cannot make my little baby stop practicing his jumping jacks, or swimming his laps, or whatever the heck he is doing inside there at 4am. I also cannot help my mental midget Kitty. Believe me, I have tried. But I can’t keep her from crawling onto my chest and purring in happiness. If I lock her out of the bedroom, she sets herself up so that she bangs on the door with her back legs like Thumper. And this is infinitely more annoying. Also, I can’t help her from scratching on the bathroom door so she can go in and worship her faucet. In fact, this has become slightly more annoying since we put those plastic claw covers on her, since now she squeaks when she scratches. Sigh. If I could help her, I would, but unfortunately she is just beyond help…Snoring Hubby is also a challenge. I usually just elbow him and tell him to roll over, and this buys me 20 minutes where I can try and quickly fall asleep again.

So, there it is. My sleep plan. While I haven’t found a solution, I have figured out how to make it slightly more tolerable. I know this is just going to get worse in the next 3 months, and then I will have sleep issues of a completely different nature once my little gymnast gets his lungs working. I suppose this is just the preparation for what is to come…crap.

Mommy Guilt

So, Hubby and I were talking the other day that things have really changed for us now. Before, we just thought of what was best for ME, then it changed to what was best for US. Now, it's what is best for BABY. It's weird. Peanut is apparently the size of a banana, and right now the only way we know he is there is because I am fatter, and I have little kicks going on inside, sort of like Alien or something. But still, he is slowly but surely taking over our lives. And with that comes the Mommy Guilt that I am not doing things right.

For instance, the other day we were laying in bed, and Hubby asks "Do you think you should have the laptop on your belly?". If anyone else would have said this to me, my preggo monster would have gotten upset and something snarky would have come out. But, this was my dearest Hubby saying it, and all I could think was "I don't know. I am endangering our Peanut!" and promptly removed the laptop to a more awkward side position.

I know my dietary habits and physical activity level are definitely not ideal. Actually, they are probably the opposite of ideal. I mean, I ate poutine two days in a row. Two. Days. In. A. Row. That cannot be good. And my exercise is walking 2 blocks from the train station to work every day. So yeah, needless to say, I could definitely be putting a little more effort in there. And I sometimes forget to take my prenatal vitamins. GASP. I mean to do well, I really do. I want to be that perfect mommy that does absolutely everything right. It's just I have no willpower. Like most other things in life, I start doing something, and then old habit and general laziness set in. But this time it comes with the high cost of Mommy Guilt. Before, it was just me I was letting down. Now, it's me, Hubby, and Peanut (I sincerely doubt that Kitty is feeling let down in this situation. As long as she gets her laser pointer and I have a bath every now and then so she can worship the faucet, she is pretty content).

I realize that I can't be perfect, and that I am probably baking a perfectly fine little Peanut. In fact, the doctors keep telling me that is the case. I am not gaining too much weight, and all tests have come back normal. I know Hubby still loves me and thinks I am doing a fabulous job (after all, I am a pretty decent baker...), but it is really hard to let go of that nagging little voice that you are doing things ALL WRONG. And the trouble is that I know it is only going to get worse. Once Peanut arrives, then there are a million other things to feel guilty about. Everything you do is wrong, and there are people, and books, and doctors and TV shows there to tell you all about it.

But you know what? I must not be the only Mommy that feels this way, and we can't ALL be wrong, you know? So that means I am right some of the time. I can only do what I think is best. And I suppose that means that perhaps not giving into every craving (maybe once a week is sufficient for poutine?) and maybe busting out that prenatal yoga DVD once in a while would be small steps that would make me feel infinitely better and help to assuage the guilt for the time being. After all, we can't all be perfect, can we?

General Happenings on the Long Weekend...

Life after finding out the gender has been interesting. It was a fun experience, and I am glad we did it. But it is a little strange. Before there were 2 possibilities, and we planned for both. We thought of what would happen with a little girl, and what would happen with a little boy. Now we only have the one option. Not that that's a bad thing, it's just an adjustment. I actually think this would have been much worse if we went through the whole pregnancy, especially if we started really leaning towards a girl, and then found out it was a boy. So I am glad we have the time to prepare now.

Also, it makes things like names much easier. We had already narrowed boy's names down to a few choices, whereas the girl's names we hadn't even began to narrow anything down. So that's sort of a relief. Also, we can start to plan the nursery, which will be fun.

In other news, Kitty's claw covers are starting to come off now. So she has like 2 razor sharp claws on each paw, and she is trying desperately to destroy the couch with them every chance she gets. It is driving me CRAZY! She totally does it on purpose too. She looks us right in the eye and then starts to scratch. Like she is daring us to do something about it. Just yelling at her isn't enough of a deterrent now. It's like she knows we won't actually do anything but make loud noises. So, today I had had enough, and after she tried for the 4th time in 2 minutes to scratch the chair, I tried to a) throw something at her and b) get up and chase her.

Hubby was sitting on the couch playing Nazi Zombies on Xbox live with certain friends and he felt it necessary to have a running commentary which sounded like this: "The wife is getting mad at the cat. The wife if throwing things at the cat. She missed and hit the Xbox. The wife is now trying to chase the cat, but the cat is much much faster than the wife. *insert comment from Hubby's friend here* Yeah...she's not as quick as she used to be". Nice. Yes, I am getting rather chubby and awkward, but I am growing a tiny human!! AND, I am trying to discipline our unruly cat. What is HE doing? Sitting around and trying to kill Nazi Zombies with his buddies...if there were actually Nazi Zombies running around, and his actions helped to reduce the population of said zombies, then I would understand. But this is obviously not the case...

The things we pregnant fatsos put up with...sigh.

Our "Special" Kitty

So, as previously mentioned, our family currently consists of Hubby, me, and our Kitty (also, Peanut is on the way, but Peanut is only about the size of an avocado right now).

Let me tell you about Kitty. First off, her name is Kitty. Yes, we are that original. Trust me, thinking of names for the baby has been a nightmare so far. Although we are quite sure we won't name it "Baby".

She is a gorgeous, beautiful, adorable little cat. The only problem is she is dumb. Like REALLY dumb. She's sort of like the hot blond bimbo from high school. You know, the one that looks amazing, but as soon as she opens her mouth people moan and roll their eyes and say "Is it possible that someone can be THAT dumb?!" Yeah, that's Kitty. She makes Kelly Bundy look like Einstein.

(Yes, she is lying on a water bottle...see what I mean?!?)

We are quite sure she suffers from ADD. She changes focus every 2 seconds. And she is instantly calmed when you put a blanket over her. It's like she needs a safe place with no distractions. The second you shove her under a blanket she starts purring and gets all comfy-like. And she loves boxes. My parents were looking after her when Hubby and I went on our mini-honeymoon to Seattle. I got email updates from my mom. At the beginning they were similar to this:

Mom: Your cat hasn't moved from under the couch since you brought her over. I think she is eating, but it is hard to tell, since she just hides under there the whole day. We also don't see her at night, so it's possible she is under there all night as well. Poor Kitty :(

Then one day things turned around. Do you know how? My mom "brought her a box". Which means she went downstairs to the crawl space, pulled out some crappy old box that was sitting there for months, if not years, and put it down in the middle of the living room floor in front of the television, then went about her business. Sure enough, within seconds Kitty was in the box, purring. Dumb cat.

She is also fascinated with water. Not her drinking water, but any water that she should not have. Like the water in my cup that I am drinking from. She should not have that. But she wants it desperately. Or the water that comes out of the bathroom tap.

She sits in the bathtub staring up at the faucet like it is some type of deity which will spew forth manna and honey from it's mouth if you are devoted enough. It's like Linus waiting for the Great Pumpkin. It's just sad. When I do turn on the tap for a bath, she quickly becomes fascinated with the bath water and her life goal is to drink it. Never mind that it is usually full of soapy bubbles and gross human dirt. She goes to great lengths to drink it, no matter what obstacle is thrown in her way. Me splashing gallons of water in her face until she is dripping wet? No problem! Occasionally slipping into the water because she is bent over the edge at impossible angles? Shake it off and resume the mission! When she does actually manage to get a mouthful, despite my  best efforts, she usually hates it, jumps off the tub, shakes her paws and gives a look that says "How DARE you think I would drink such crappy water!". Does this stop her from doing it all over again the next time I run a bath. No. No it doesn't.

So that is my Kitty. I felt I should give you fair warning and background on her, just in case when I mention her it sounds like she is normal or something. Because she definitely isn't.

It would be interesting to start a support group for owners of dumb pets. Anyone else have ridiculous animal stories?